Ad blocker interference detected!
Wikia is a free-to-use site that makes money from advertising. We have a modified experience for viewers using ad blockers
Wikia is not accessible if you’ve made further modifications. Remove the custom ad blocker rule(s) and the page will load as expected.
Tony came to the clinic and was seen by Gregory House. Tony claimed to be sexually attracted to cows and asked for depo-provera in order to decrease his sexual excitement. Dr. House told him that this would chemically castrate him and had other negative side effects, but Tony didn't care. At that point, Dr. House was convinced Tony was playing a gag on him, probably to impress some friends at college. He told him he would be writing a prescription for something totally harmless that looked like depo-provera so he could brag to his friends about how shocked the doctor was.
However, Tony was soon back in the clinic claiming that a cow had kicked him in his leg. He once again begged Dr. House for depo-provera. Dr. House looked at the injury and saw an obvious splinter, so he realized Tony had hit himself with a piece of wood, like a baseball bat or two-by-four to cause the injury. When Tony kept going on about how beautiful he found cows, Dr. House told him that although cow loving was a real psychological condition, people with the condition didn't wax poetic about it - they try to rationalize it. Tony insisted he had the problem and Dr. House told him that he would have to undergo a series of painful and humiliating tests to confirm it. However, Tony agreed.
When Dr. House came back with the test results, he busted Tony. Although Tony had claimed that cows were too beautiful to eat, he had serum albumen protein levels that indicated he had either eaten beef, guinea pigs or other human beings recently. Since Tony denied eating the other two, Dr. House insisted he must have eaten beef and wanted to know why Tony was really there. Tony went quiet, then took a picture out of his pocket and showed it to Dr. House. It was a beautiful young woman in a bikini. Dr. House admired the picture and Tony told him it was his mother. Dr. House was confused for a moment as the woman was obviously only a few years older than Tony. It soon became apparent that it was Tony's Stepmom. Tony's father was frequently out of the country, and his stepmom insisted on walking around the house in as little clothing as possible and giving him massages. House wondered why Tony was resisting, but Tony insisted that he couldn't go through with it as it would hurt his father. He begged Dr. House for a three month supply of depo-provera until he could finish college move out of the house. Dr. House finally agreed and Tony breathed a sigh of relief.